Love Hamlet

I am standing on the shore

With one foot in the ocean

The other on the sand

The one in the ocean is pulling me

Calling me out to dive and swim

To wade through the shallow waters

And float to the deeper ones

To rejoice in the whirlpools

To keep swimming till I drown

And lose myself to the mighty waves

The one on the sand hinders me

It pulls me back to the shore

A summon to safe heavens and sane places

It has me glued to the spot

Stuck and immovable

Held back

Trapped in an octopus’ legs

I am torn in half

Between diving and staying

My being split into two

Between sanity and madness

To step in or step back

That is the question

Will I hear the calling of the ocean?

Will the octopus set me free?

Will I drown and lose myself

Or will I stay put on the safety of the shore?

The Nurse

One pale day when I will be all sad and dejected, disappointed by life. Sitting by the window with my head perched on the table looking out at the rain and the dark grey desolate sky. I would be lost somewhere in the melancholy of it. And then you would come. Sit by my side and not say a word. Without breaking the silence, without ruining the sanctity of the moment, you would just sit by my side. And bring your head by mine. You would look at me warmly with the intensity of those eyes, your hazel eyes swirling with molten honey. And gently you will bring your scented fingers to my hair. And you will stroke them. You will stroke them with all the love you have ever known. You will run those slender fingers between those glossy black hairs as if you waited a lifetime for this moment. And your soft pores will absorb all the pain and sorrow. And I would just sit quietly, close my eyes and let you be the healer, let you be the nurse. Let you wrap yourself around me like a child. Let you be the balm I have waited for eternity. I’ll let you soothe me, comfort me, nurse me back me to health. Let you caress all my wounds. Let you be that coat in the cold. And in that moment I know I will be fine, I will be good. I will be healed, all my pain gone all the sorrow whisked away, all my pangs dissolved, all my sadness vanishing into thin air. 

Vineyard

We are sowing a vineyard

You and I

Watering it each day

With our warmth and care

Nurturing it with

With affection and love

And this vineyard will grow

And it will flourish

One day when we will part

When you would go your own path

And I will go my own way

One day when we will finally say

The final goodbye

When I will leave you

And you will leave me

This vineyard of ours

It will engulf us

Surround our beings

The vines will wrap them around us

Strangling and suffocating  

With all our warmth

Our care and affection

All the madness

The poison

And chaos

And then finally

The grapes will be picked

And the wine brewed

The wine of our memories

Of unheard melodies and unsung sonnets

Of regrets and sorrows

Of pain and pangs

Of unsaid words and repressed desires

Of sad goodbyes and streams of secret tears

Of unfulfilled wishes and long sighs

And we will pour that wine

In our own places

In our own glasses

In our own times

And we will drink it

We will drink it to our fill

Without clinking our glasses

And seeing the other in the eye

The wine of our vineyard

Dreams and Nightmares

 

We had a dream

Of a shimmery evening

On the pier by the sea

Then we had a nightmare

Of dark desolate alleys

With demons and monsters alike

Playing it Safe

Let's not toy with sanity now

Let sane logic prevail

Let us part now

And swim in shallow waters

Playing it safe

Sunset

As I passed

Through the highway

Sitting by the window

The gleaming sunset caught my eye

The sky

A tapestry of blue and pink

Weaved together

In a lifelong embrace

And the scattered specks of clouds

The shape of your finely done eyebrows

Over those dry rocky mounts

I was spellbound

My gaze held

By the divine palette of colors

As the sun went slowly down

And the auras changed

To red and gold

Out of nowhere

I saw your face appear

That glint of your brown eyes

Your sunlight kissed face

And that smile

Dancing before my eyes once more

I Will Go Now

I will just go now

Walk away

Stutter to a land far off

And sleep like a baby

 In a meadow

With marble benches

Dark green canopies

And yellow fruits

Melody

But don't you know

You are the melody

Which makes the strings of this lute

Dance to perfection?

Do You Know?

Do you know?

How is it

To have to keep your demons locked

With nothing to unleash them on

Do you know?

How is it

 To watch the demons

 Dancing the evil dance

With their fingers flicking with fire

While move round and round

In a circle around you

And you sit and stare

As they make those evil faces

Stick their tongues out                                               

And laugh those impish grins

Do you know?

How is it

To have a range of hells

Inside your head

And move from one hell to another

Every changing moment

Guiding Star

 

And then

I fashioned you out

From my heart

In glitter and stardust

Poured in it on my palms

And whisked it away to the heavens

There you flew

And became the bright star

In the dark sky above my head

Becoming the guiding light

My guiding star

Bliss

Deserted rooftop

The soothing silence of the night

Roll of thunder in the distance

2 am conversations

With the cloudy sky

The crickets chirping nearby

Wafts of cool breeze on my face

Loose flip flops in the feet

The spontaneous smile

The bliss of solitude!

Wounds And Time

There are some wounds which never heal. These are the ones you never get over. They say that time heals everything. But the truth is that it does not. Time does not heal them. They just become numb. Or we just get used to them. Maybe we do. I don’t know. I am not sure. Time just puts its infinite layers on them. And each day passes the layers keep on increasing. One layer after the other. And the wounds are buried deep inside them. Safe. Out of sight. Somewhere down below. But never healed. A little bruise, a slight shove and there they surface again. Raw and fresh as they once were. Cut open again. Seeping with blood. 

You And I

We are poetic.

No we are poetry.

You and I.

We are like art.

No we are art.

You and I.

If It Were For Me

If it were for me

I would lie in your lap forever

And let you stroke my hair

All night long

If it were for me

I would cry in your hair

And bare my soul

Let you stitch

All the pieces together

If it were for me

I'd hold you in my arms

Kiss your forehead

And never let you go

If it were for me

I'd let you hold my face

And caress it

Ruffle my hair

For forever and ever

If it were for me

I'd never cut loose

The electrical connection

Which runs

 Between us

Like wild fire.

Fine Wine

So then

We became

Each other's fine wine

Taking a draught

Only when thirsty

Bring Me A Potion

Bring me a potion

An elixir

Something that would shut the mind

Numb the senses

Stop the avalanche of thoughts

Halt the whirlpool of crazy obsessions

Fend the volcano of dark demons

And If Ever

 

And if I ever find you

As a whiff of fresh air

Or a fragrance lingering somewhere beautiful

I will bare my soul

I will bare my soul to you.

Letting Her Go

And I let the butterfly fly away

Unscathed and untouched

I let the dove out of the cage

Unspoiled and unbroken

As pristine as ever

Melting Hazel of Your Eyes

I feel satiated

Drunk to my fill

As if I had a fine shot of vodka

Or did I get lost forever

In the melting hazel of your eyes?

Love Virgin

And he had the honor of engraving the first letter on the clean slate of her heart. Never would she forget the first. Not even in her sleep. He penetrated all the layers of iron that she had built around her heart shielding it from the emotions and feelings she thought were a sign of weakness. Vulnerability is a trait of the weak and mean she said. But he penetrated the tough exterior all the same. Like a fish diving into the mighty ocean he dived straight into her heart, free and effortless. He sold her the best dreams one ever could. And she bought them. The dreams were just too magical to resist. She felt herself being spun around in a rainbow, flying high in the sky like a nymph. Her defenses could not hold. The mighty iron wall came tumbling down like a castle of sand. All her arrogance, her pride, her ego withered away before the spell he cast. He had the wee bit honor of breaking her. He stained the love virgin with indelible marks on her soul forever. He became a part of her. Something she will never be able to let go of. And she gave a bit of her soul to him. Something she would never have back. He became a part of her literature with the pieces and bits of him peering from her letters. He would always be found in those words if someone ever tried to explore them. Immortalized in the ink of her words for the ages to come.  

Nostalgia

And the wind caressed my face

Bringing forth

All your velvety whispers

And savory kisses

Back in an instant.

Parting

    

On a foggy eve

In a café

In a beautiful street

In downtown Paris

Two strangers sitting

On a table by the window

A hot cup of cocoa

A macaroon with it

Parting their ways

Strangers

Neither friends nor foes

Neither love nor woe

(The angel and the dove)

We are just strangers

Baring our souls.

Unheard Melodies

You could live in the same house

Under the same roof

For thirty years

And not feel anything

And you could spend

Three days with a stranger

And get pulled in by the whirlpool

Of their unheard melodies

And unsung sonnets

In an instant

Caught in their spell

Forever

Time has been just a lazy spectator

Watching us from a distance

And laughing

As how we fall prey to its infinite traps.

My Idea Of Heaven

Your idea of heaven is wine and houris

Beautiful women and their splendor

Jewels and diamonds

Sapphires and rubies

Lakes of milk and honey

Palaces and army of slaves

Tell them this is not my heaven

My idea of heaven is a serene green land

A meadow with white flowers

 Where lovers roam

Holding hands

Unafraid of losing each other

Ever

My idea of heaven is an adorable little girl

The cherubic smile on her doting face

Etched forever

My idea of heaven is children

Beautiful cute little children

Lots of them

Their laughs rising like colorful bubbles

My idea of heaven is eternal peace

The bliss which never leaves

The love you forever feel

My idea of heaven is a place

Where a mother never wails

For a dead child

Where a father never lifts a light coffin

Not wines and houris

Nor rubies and sapphires

Not palaces and slaves

My heaven is eternal peace

The bliss which never leaves
The love you forever feel

Effortless

Catching feelings

Like catching cold

On a bitter frost night.

Life As We Know

Hollering desires
Seething emptiness

The missing pieces

The ever present absence

The unbridled heart

Never ending struggles

Unfettered longings

Inciting impulses

Burning temptations
Dark abysses
Intricate mazes
Haunting obsessions
Dancing demons

Endless circle of suffering

Unrelenting chains of pain.

Roadside

Cloudy Sky
Bare trees nearby

Cars swooshing past

Courtyard of a cozy café

Little wooden chairs

And round little tables

Red and white napkins

Polka dots table cloth

Fluttering with the breeze

Yellow roses

Blue vases

Raybans and long coats

Leather jackets and long boots

That fringe on the forehead

Soft murmur on the lips

Never fading smiles

Occasional laughter

Bells tinkling

Glint of the ring

The world wrapped in a rainbow.

Somewhere In The Sky

Clouds scattered

In the deep blue sky

Soft fluffy cotton candy

White as snow

Endless love

Pure bliss.

Tapestries

We are all weaving

the tapestries of our story

And our tapestries are the same

It’s the colors which differ

They have different shades

Their own auras

The stories we weave

Are all one tapestry

It’s our color which

Gives it the touch of our story.

Tonight

Tonight I’m missing you

Like I never have

Snuggling in the blanket

Sitting in my warm bed

I hear your voice

Calling out my name

Again and again

It resonates

The softness of it

Drenched in pure silk

The sweetness

Someone pouring honey in my ears

My heart melts

Soft as wax

Arising feelings

Sweet as hot chocolate,

Drinking In

I am drinking in your love

I’m drinking from all the memories

That we made

I’m drinking the golden syrup

Of the memories

Poured out in silver cups

Basking in ecstatic delight

My soul is singing the same song

It used to sing

When it heard your voice.

Reminiscence

I remember the poem I wrote
For you
And then sent it all the way
It was a silly one
A simple thing
Yet so full of love
You had loved it
Waking up to it
Reading it first in the morn
You had absolutely adored it
Never did I know
That in the days to come
I would be writing
Verse after verse
Looking for the trail
that disappeared
Into a dark cave
At midnight
In the blue moon.

Paper and Blazing Colors

Whenever I will miss you

I will pour you out

Raw

On paper

Dyed

In blazing colors,

Red and Gold

The sun is about to set

The world is dyed in shades

Of orange and gold

The wind becomes colder

I zip up my jacket

Up to the neck

Wrap my arms around me

Feeling the chill

Of the approaching evening

I shudder a little

A strange sadness engulfs me

Taking me in its arms

Ever so gently

Makes me smile

A small tear flows

Out of the corner of my eye

I reminisce

Feeling the sweet pain

Faintly

Somewhere in the heart

Missing You

Missing you is screaming out

With my voice muffled

By coarse hands

Missing you is a bellow

In the dark empty space

Which disappears in a black hole

Missing you is shouting

In an old deserted house

Where my voice comes piercing back

In echoes

Only to haunt me

Phasing Out

I am phasing out

Of your love

Slowly

Inevitably

And I am afraid

I think now

I have to keep

the pain close

Or the heart

Might become

A barren land

It once was

Dilemma

I am watching you

Slip away

Slowly

Like sand from my clenched fist

 I'm watching

A helpless man

Befuddled by the dilemma

Of holding you close

And letting go

Write It on The Water

I'm afraid of writing your name

I told her

Then write it on the water, she said

No one would see it.

Loving You

Loving you was exhausting

Tiring

Draining me of all

But it was enriching

And fulfilling

Both my heart and soul

Drank to their fill

From the golden syrup

Of your love

Oblivion

Sometimes I feel

The words and phrases

I write

Are lost in black nothingness

Like a wisp of smoke

They dissolve into thin air

Disappearing in the space

Swallowed by black holes

Let the demons sleep tonight!

Let the demons sleep tonight

Don’t wake them up

Let them slumber

They will wreak havoc

If they wake up

This calm will tumble into chaos

Let the fairies dance tonight

In the moonlight

Let them dance and make love

To the flowers

Let them sprinkle their light

Let the demons sleep tonight

Fear

But I do need pain
That bittersweet one
To make me feel 

a little more sensitive
To make my heart 

a little more soft
Or I am afraid
I will become an animal again.

In the Rain

The rain brushes our faces so gently

The unruly wind plays with your hair

Unfurling them

You struggle with the effort to keep them

Off your face

I take your cold hands in mine

Warm them

With my breath 

A scene

Cold winter nights
The silence of 3 am
Warmth in the kitchen
The taste of hot chocolate
A sad tune playing
The memories dancing. 

Surely

The demons in your head

The monsters of your imagination

Shall devour you slowly.

Pixels

I zoom a picture

And I zoom it too much

The pixels burst

The picture blurs

The beauty fades

Maybe people are like pictures

You go too close

The beauty fades

The ugliness strikes

Balcony

You imagined us

On a balcony

With a cup of tea

Hands intertwined

Looking over

Corn fields.

In Memory

I guess I do want you to miss me

Not much

Not always

But yes

A little bit sometimes

I want you to remember me

Always

And think of me in a loving memory

Not the one which crushes you inside

Making it difficult to breathe

And wells up your eyes with tears

But the one which fills you with that bliss

That you are surrounded by the halo of love

And feel the warmth in your heart

So that every time you think of me

You smile

 And send me love and light

All the way

Across the oceans.

Search

Like a three year old

Searching for her lost toy

We are children

Looking haplessly

For love

In every nook and corner

In all the spaces

Looking

Desperately

Relentlessly

For love

Hungry

And thirsty

We long for it

We are looking for love.

Words

Words words words

Words are everything

Words have a color

Their own scent

Words have a taste

Their own crispiness

Some are crunchy

And some just melt in the mouth

Words give meaning

But sometimes they destroy it

Words have their own shades

They have their auras

Words are bright

As a sunny March day

Words are dark

Like a sky before heavy rain

Words are like soothing lullabies

Words are screaming echoes

Words are butterflies

Flying in orchards

Words are snakes

In the barren desert.

Weaving

I need to weave something

I say

Weave words, she says.

Abyss

And then it so happened

That we lost words

Like falling into a dark grey abyss

Falling

Falling

And falling

Never reaching the end

Never touching the depth.

Still

I sit

Still as an ancient statue

Staring into infinite space

I wonder and marvel

At the so tangible

Emptiness around me.

Voice

At the end of the day

When all is said and done

And you are sitting

Contemplating

On what you gained

And what you lost

This pain would help you find

Your voice!

Helium Balloons

Helium balloons

Butterflies

Greenest grass

The memory of this garden

Will always last.

Azul

Azul blue sky

A bunch of falcons

Circling it relentlessly

Tall bare trees

Pointy dry branches

A shredded kite

Stuck somewhere

Meeting

You came

And then I met myself.

Winter

The sound of the bat striking the ball
The warmth of the sun
The scent of oranges
Clear blue skies
Boys laughing
Winter.

A Scene

The pink of the evening

The only star in the sky

The full moon

Blazing out in perfection

The lone wolf

Howling in the pitch dark

Atop a hill

Against the silhouette

Of the dark trees

Shattering the silence

Of the night

Writing

Writing

Never comes easy

Like seeping blood
From the wounds
Won over time

As if something
Clawing at the heart

Bleeding it open

To fill the pen

Making the being

Restless as the unruly wind

That’s how it is

To illuminate the words

Blood is the cost.

Caution

Playing with words

That is an art

Choosing them

With caution

Like picking up a precious souvenir

From burning coal

As not to burn the fingers

She had mastered it

Like no other I know

When you wake up

When you wake up

I wonder if you have this heaviness in your heart

Or if you feel this emptiness

 Screaming in your chest

When you wake up

I wonder if the flood of memories

Strangles you

 Suffocates you

I wonder how you struggle with the onslaught

When you wake up

I wonder if you are overcome

With the burgeoning desire

To call out my name.

Chord

A thousand memories strike a chord

Against this heart

Wrenching it

Clenching it

The beat becomes faster

The thud becomes louder

The chord strikes and strikes again

Making it a symphony

Of unabated emotions

Him

Disheveled hair

That rough beard

The half-smile on his face

Eyes which always said the otherwise

That was him.

In Moments

Like on a roller coaster ride

Swinging from ecstatic excitement

To hopeless despair

In moments.

Untitled

Like the froth on coffee

Things disappear

Quick and soft

Nothingness

There were hours

Hours filled with that irksome nothingness

That grey emptiness

The meaninglessness

Gnawing you

Inside out

Bamboos

And then you disappeared

 In a land full of bamboos, tall and dark.

Away you went

And never returned

Incomplete

In the hustle of time

In the monotony of routine

In the rush of life

Something is left

Unsaid

Unheard

Undone

And incomplete…..

The Meadows

Come to the meadows

Where the grass is still green

Come with me

Where the horses neigh happy and loud

Come with me to the place

Where lovers still hold hands without any fears

Where the butterflies dance

Bright blue and purple

Red and dark

Come to the pathways

Where leaves rustle 

and where autumn is not sad.